Throughout Advent, the children of our church have been hearing the story of “Big Head Bob and the Northern Light.” The final installment of this story will be given at the Christmas Eve Service. For those unable to make it, here you can find the full text of the story:
Big Head Bob and the Northern Light
Part One
It is hard to say when things really started to go bad for Big Head Bob. It might have been the day he was born at Penelope’s Perfect Pet Store, or it might have been the day the giant hand of Mrs. Mudridge reached down into his cage and took him home, or it might have the day he arrived in Mrs. Mudridge’s fifth grade class. Matters steadily got worse after that. There were all the rude and inconsiderate hands that grabbed and squeezed him regardless of whether he was eating or sleeping. Then, there were the Thompson Twins who liked to play catch by throwing him over the top of Janice Beatlebottom’s head. It was also the Thompson Twins who had named him Big Head Bob. Up until that point, he had just been Bob, the hamster, but then the kids discovered how Bob could store food in pouches alongside his head and how this food could cause Bob’s head to expand to three times its normal size. Thus, Bob became Big Head Bob. As bad as all this might sound, the absolute worst was the day Janice snuck into the class during recess in order to liberate Bob. She thought he needed to be set free, but little did she know that Bob knew nothing about how to survive on his own. He had lived his whole life with others feeding him and keeping him warm.
Janice liberated Bob in the girl’s bathroom and for a week Bob hide behind the toilet only to occasionally appear and then hear screams of fright from little girls yelling that they had seen a rat. At first, Bob was afraid. He had seen rats at night in Mrs. Mudridge’s class, and they were mean and ugly. Eventually, however, Bob realized that the girls thought he was a rat. Bob was outraged. Just because hamsters and rats were both rodents didn’t mean they were alike. Rats were dirty scoundrels who could only dream of being adorable, fluffy pets like hamsters.
Eventually, one night Bob was able to escape the girl’s bathroom. He ran and ran and ran until finally he ran straight into the school’s gymnasium. In the closet of the gymnasium, he found a basket full of foam soccer balls. Soon by chewing off enough foam he created for himself the softest bed upon which he had ever slept. The happiness of this bed was only short-lived. Bob still felt sad because of all the dirty names and insults from the kids. In his mind, he heard their voices over and over again, “Big Head Bob! Rat!”
What Bob needed was hope, hope that he would one day be loved and appreciated for who he was: an adorable, furry hamster. One day Bob would get two gigantic morsels of hope. It was the day the children had their holiday concert in the gymnasium. The first gigantic morsel of hope appeared while the kids were singing a song called “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer.” The song told of a reindeer named Rudolph who had been made fun of and called names like Pinocchio. It told of how Rudolph eventually found someone who loved and appreciated him for who he was. This person was named Santa. Bob knew in that moment that he would have to find this Santa and meet him. The problem was how would he ever find him. He probably lived far, far away.
Part Two
On the day of the holiday concert, Bob received his second gigantic morsel of hope. It came from an unlikely source: the father of Janice Beatlebottom. Right after the children had finished singing “All I want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth,” the principal of the school introduced their special guest speaker for the day: George Beatlebottom. The principal explained that George was one of the few rare people who had actually met Santa Clause in person. George had received this special honor because he was a crewman on board the Northern Light, a submarine that traveled to the North Pole every year. The Northern Light was responsible for delivering everything Santa’s elves needed in order to make their Christmas gifts for little boys and girls. Because the North Pole was so cold and icy, planes and boats could not get there nearly as easily as submarines. Submarines can travel way down deep in the ocean underneath all of the ice.
When George spoke, he had the attention of the whole audience. He told the kids that Santa Clause was the English name for a man who is otherwise known as Saint Nicholas. He talked about how Saint Nicholas seemed to glow with love and joy. Everyone who met him felt like they were accepted and appreciated for who they were. It didn’t matter if they were wide or thin, tall or short. This filled Bob with hope. All he needed to do was find someway to get on board the Northern Light. Then, he would get to meet Saint Nick himself, but how would he get on board?
“Think, Bob, think,” he said to himself. “Oh, what can I do?” It was at this moment that Bob caught sight of Janice Beatlebottom in the audience. She was bursting with pride over her father’s speech. Bob knew right then and there that Janice was his ticket. He snuck out of the gymnasium closet in which he was hiding, and he ran as fast as he could back to Mrs. Mudridge’s empty classroom. In a mad dash, he raced across the room and launched himself into the air flying straight into the side pocket of Janice Beatlebottom’s backpack. All he had to do was make it to the Beatlebottom house and then sneak into one of the bags George Beatlebottom planned to take on his next trip to the North Pole.
Part Three
Janice Beatlebottom’s backpack was a bumpy ride. By the time, they arrived at the Beatlebottom household, Bob felt a little sea sick. How was he ever going to handle a submarine ride to the North Pole? Bob had no time to worry about that. He now had to worry about how he would find a way for George Beatlebottom to take him on board the Northern Light. After everyone had gone to bed, Bob sneaked out of Janice’s backpack and tiptoed his way around the house. He went in and out of rooms searching for something that he could be certain George would take with him on his trip. Bob started to get sleepy, but he forced himself to stay awake. Finally, he spotted a giant duffle bag that said “Northern Light” on the side. This was almost certainly George Beatlebottom’s bag. Luckily, it was open and full of George’s clothes: socks, underwear, pants, shirts. After spending most of his life living among shredded pieces of newspaper, George’s duffle bag of clothes looked like a dream house with a luxury bed that was even nicer than bits and pieces of foam soccer balls. Eager to get some sleep Bob burrowed down deep between the underwear and socks. With thoughts of Saint Nick, Bob quickly fell asleep.
The next morning Bob awoke to the sound of a loud z-z-z-z-z-z-i-p. Suddenly, everything was dark. George had zipped his bag shut. Soon Bob felt the bag swing into the air. He was off for another rocky ride. Bob thought this ride would never come to an end. The loud noises and voices he heard were even louder than the one’s on Janice’s school bus, but eventually everything came to a stop. The bag had landed somewhere. Voices faded. There was silence. It sounded as if no one was around. Slowly, Bob managed to pull back part of the zipper and look outside. He was in a room full of bunk beds. This is where George and the rest of the crew for the Northern Light slept. Bob had made it on board. “Yippee!” cried Bob. “North Pole here I come!”
In that very moment, however, not everyone was happy. Far, far away, at the North Pole in fact, jolly Saint Nick was not feeling so jolly. “People say I am the most popular guy in the world,” Saint Nick said to Spartakus, an elf with whom he frequently shared his inner most feelings. “But they don’t know the truth. The truth is that most people only like me because they like getting a free toy. None of them even know the real Saint Nick. Being a celebrity can be lonely. I am tired of being taken for granted and nobody appreciating me for who I really am. Maybe I shouldn’t deliver any gifts this year. Then, people will realize how much they need me.”
Spartakus was shocked. How could Saint Nick not deliver any gifts this year?! Has he gone mad?! That would ruin Christmas for kids around the world!
Part Four
On board the Northern Light, everything was going well for Bob until one day George Beatlebottom dug his hand deep down into his bag as he searched for a pair of clean underwear. It was then that he felt something furry touch his hand. Surprised, he leaped backward. Slowly, he crept closer to the bag and peered inside. It was then that he saw two eyes peering back at him. They were the eyes of a hamster. George quickly grabbed a hold of Bob and looked at him closely. “Hmmmm….,” he said, “This might make a good Christmas gift for somebody.”
Hours later Bob was being closely examined by Spartakus, the elf. Only in exceptional circumstances had Saint Nick ever been in the business of delivering animals to kids. Most of the time the sleigh ride was too cold and dangerous for delivering them. Hamsters, however, had some potential. They were furry enough to keep themselves warm, and they were small enough that they could be easily packed away.
Spartakus decided to take the matter to Saint Nick, even though Saint Nick was still brooding over whether to deliver any presents at all. Saint Nick was indeed feeling a bit grumpy when Spartakus knocked on his door. He was about to tell Spartakus to leave him alone, but then his eyes caught sight of Bob. “My, my, my,” said Saint Nick. “What do we have here?” By this point, Bob was jumping for joy. He was finally meeting Saint Nick.
“Why isn’t this the most adorable, little creature you have ever seen?” cried Saint Nick.
Spartakus was overjoyed to see Saint Nick in a good mood once again. It was in that moment that Spartakus had a sudden idea. “Well, Saint Nick,” he said, “all of us elves thought you would like him. We realize how much work you do all by yourself on Christmas Eve on behalf of boys and girls everywhere, and so we decided that you needed someone to keep you company as you fly from rooftop to rooftop. Just because you’re the most famous celebrity on earth, doesn’t mean you have to feel all alone. Now, you’ve got a lovable little guy to cheer your spirits on a cold winter night.”
Saint Nick’s eyes brimmed with tears. Spartakus knew just what he needed. Saint Nick looked back at his new fury friend and declared, “Why this little tyke is perfect, and look he has a big head just like me. Ho, ho, ho…”
Bob had already been overwhelmed with excitement at becoming Saint Nick’s new companion. Now, he thought he was going to faint from delight. “Saint Nick likes my big head!” he exclaimed to himself. “Saint Nick has a big head too!”
“Well, well, little buddy,” said Saint Nick. “Thanks to you it looks like it is going to be a merry Christmas after all. Ho, ho, ho…”
The End
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